02262018What's Hot:
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Robert Mueller Just Cold Charging Folks Trump’s Never Heard Of Now, Just To Fuck With Him

Mama said knock you out. We have a feeling part of special counsel Robert Mueller’s strategy right now, which could be more accurately described as a “ballet” or a “symphony” or “Virtue and Moir’s gold medal-winning free skate [...]
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Trump Staffers Just Love How Mass Shootings Let Them Catch Some Well-Deserved R&R

Trump White House so chill right now. People have a lot of different reactions to mass shooting terrorist attacks, some all at the same time. Sadness, shock, helplessness, rage, frustration that it’s happening again, numbness because it happens [...]
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Wonkette’s Weekly Top Ten Just LOVES Mueller Time

1 week ago | 0 comment
Good morning, Wonkers, what a week we just had. Beautiful things like the Winter Olympics, terrible things like the godawful school shooting, wonderful things like MUELLER TIME, disgusting things like Donald Trump [...]
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Just Donald Trump Raw-Dogging A Playboy Model, Sorry About Your Lunch

1 week ago | 0 comment
Who’s excited to talk some more about Donald Trump’s wandering dick? Anyone? Anyone? YEAH, US NEITHER. But we have to, since Donald Trump is the president and what he does with his nasty, orange wiener is a potential threat to national [...]
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Mitch McConnell Just DELIGHTED To Deport Dreamers Up Shit Creek

1 week ago | 0 comment
America Dreams deferred, yet again. The Senate voted on four immigration bills yesterday, none of which received the 60 votes needed to pass. The bill that initially seemed most likely to get enough votes, a bipartisan measure similar to the [...]
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EPA Boss Scott Pruitt, Man Of Wealth And Taste, Just Can’t Get Enough Of First-Class Air Travel

2 weeks ago | 0 comment
Seems like something has changed about air travel. Oh, yeah, the peanuts. The Trump administration’s addiction to pricey luxury travel is making news again, if you can possibly believe that. Even after Tom Price was shitcanned resigned as [...]
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Is Rachel Brand Just Totally Selfish, Or Is She A Fucking Coward Too?

2 weeks ago | 0 comment
Welp. She tried. HAHA JUST KIDDING no she didn’t. We have not yet addressed the resignation of Rachel Brand, the very smart and talented number three at the Justice Department. It’s bad for a variety of reasons, all of which are that if [...]
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Orrin Hatch Just Heartbroken Over How This Rob Porter Scandal Has Hurt Orrin Hatch

2 weeks ago | 0 comment
Show us on the doll where the women Rob Porter beat up hurt you. When Orrin Hatch was first asked to comment on the allegations made by Rob Porter’s former wives and one ex-girlfriend who say that Porter, Hatch’s former Chief of Staff, [...]
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Rep. Duncan Hunter Was Just Born Too Late, Now You Can’t Even Daydrink And Carouse And Steal All The Campaign $$$

2 weeks ago | 0 comment
Founding member of the “Bro Caucus” Say, remember last month when Rep. Duncan Hunter (R-Vape Hut) said that weird thing about Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Never Convicted) maybe running for his seat if he was to BLOW UP IN THE AIR? “If I was [...]
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Does Devin Nunes Have Mad Cow Disease? We Are Just Asking.

2 weeks ago | 0 comment
christ what a fucking idiot We are not saying we know definitively whether or not Devin Nunes The Dairy Farmer might have accidentally made love to an infected British cow and contracted sexually transmitted cow dementia. We are just asking, [...]